Yesterday my coworker handed me a copy of this article she had read in Essence March 2008 issue entitled, "I'm a Mama's Boy". Immediately I thought, "Dear God, another article about a feminine man". Much to my surprise, it was about a 29 year old senior consultant who lives in New York and allows his mother to still call the shots in his life. He seeks advice from his mother on relationships, decisions, careers moves and finances. Asking moms for advice is one thing, allowing her to call the shots is another. The article talks about his mother didnt approve of one of his college girlfriends because she was 200 pounds, so he dumped her. He fell in love with another girl who came from money but his mother felt she couldnt cook, clean, or handle a household, so he dumped her. He cancelled a weekend getaway with a girl he was dating, because his mother called at the last minute and wanted to go to Atlantic City. He lied to the girlfriend and said he had a last minute business trip. COME ON!
His closing comment was , " I do think I'll eventually bring home someone my mother loves". Of course this article created much discussion amongst the co-workers, which is made up of mostly mothers of young men, and young men. One of my co-workers even EMAILED the guy (his email was included at the end of the article).
The situation to me is sad. I consider myself a mama's boy and I love my mother dearly and I value and appreciate her opinion. However, I have never allowed my mother to dictate who I can or cannot date, nor do I allow her to control my career or finances. Part of being a man is being able to handle your own, at 29 this young man is still sucking from his mothers nipples, and this saddens me.
How far are we willing to allow our mothers to control our lives?
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
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4 comments:
The nurturing factor of the mother is to protect her child. That factor will never stop unless the mother passes way, God forbid.
I don't question his manhood, but I question his ability to see the road and path that is set for him to fulfill. Most times, mother and father cannot reveal that for their children, only God can do it.
I agree with you captain. At one point in the article he mentioned that he wanted to get a tattoo to represent someone or something special in his life. First he got his mother tattooed on him and then GOD. UMM, I didnt want to put words in the man mouth, but it seems that this woman even comes before GOD.
He should be ashamed of himself. Shame on his mother too. She's so selfish and lonely she wants her son to suffer.
How far?? Well I am having mom issues as we speak. My mom still thinks I am a baby. I am almost 25 and have lived on my own since I was 19 and she still feels the need to call me and make sure I am in for the night. Or if I want to plan a trip somewhere she feels the need to want to come with me because I might get lost. lol
But I guess its because she cares and I am a girl!! I hope.
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